Let’s be honest. Even though you’ve told yourself that moving to East London doesn’t put you firmly on the hipster bandwagon, the evidence would appear to suggest otherwise.

Keep Hackney Shit

The Evidence

You’ve just signed for a flat in a converted warehouse in Hackney. You have since told at least five people about the featured wall beam.
You said “Haha! That’s COOL” while taking a photo of a quirky poster in a pub the other week.
You later uploaded the photo to your blog.
You’ve already proposed a boycott of Tesco’s fruit and veg aisle. All fresh food will henceforth come from Ridley Road market instead, subject to vigorous washing.
You are having increasingly frequent thoughts that perhaps some form of single speed, two wheeled method of “getting about” is in order. The tube is so January.
There’s no way you’d have lived in Dalston five years ago. COZ WUT ABOUT THE GUNZ?
You’ve already earmarked the cafes (adorned with low-key, jaunty signage) where you intend to spend the weekends drinking camomile tea and reading The Sunday Times.
You’ve found your new local pub. It’s in Hoxton (where else?), and you like it because you get change from a tenner when ordering three whiskey and ginger ales.

So there we have it.

Moving to East London does unfortunately carry with it the risk of becoming a hipster, but the prognosis is good. By recognising the signs and acting fast, the effects of the area can be managed.

Act fast. Behave responsibly. Like the sign says,

Keep Hackney Shit.