With a few post-Jubilee days off work at my disposal, last week I attempted to Be A Good Londoner.
In short, I was definitely, ipso-facto, 100 percento going to cram in as much cultural shiz as possible into my three days of office freedom. I scoured Time Out, Googled “things to do in London today”, asked friends for tips and canvassed Twitter for ideas. Grand ambitions – oh yeah. I had ’em.
If that sounds familiar, then you’re probably a little bit like me and every other Londoner I know: constantly penning a to-do list as long as your arm, without ever actually getting round to doing any of it.
Why? Well, firstly, there’s the horror of replicating your everyday journey to work when visiting your chosen attraction. And who wants to do that on their day off? Not fun. Also, you’ve got other stuff to do. Shoes to re-heel. Shopping to do. Cupboards to re-stock. Tea to drink. Three billion hours of YouTube videos to watch.
Oh! And then there’s this:
So in the interests of telling it like it really is, let’s look at how even the most ambitious Londoner really spends a few days off work. (more…)
Over on Bedford Street in the West End yesterday, there was a serious problem.
That problem was in Tesco, and it had a tail.
Several hundred really quite mucky tails, in fact, if the sign on the door was anything to go by:
The sign on the door at Tesco in Covent Garden yesterday (now taken down)
Around the sign stood a group of baffled, slightly disgusted workers on their lunch break; their faces desperately trying to recall the last time they got food from the supermarket, and whether it had any unexpected “pepper” garnish.
One of those people was a particularly disappointed man; his face showing signs of exertion from so spectacularly missing the point.
“But when is it going to open again?” he asked me, searching my vaguely amused face for the answer. “It says when it closed and what’s wrong, but not when it will re-open!”
Mice aside, it’s clear that the workers of Covent Garden are facing a dilemma. It’s like the song said, “Now that we found mice, what are we gonna do…for luun-ch?”
Well, fear not. Je suis on hand with three ideas for places near Covent Garden where you can get food and – most importantly in your hour of blessed office freedom – a side of friendly conversation from the staff on your lunch break.
Burritos. ‘Nuff said. Don’t be put off by the queue which often reaches out the door – it goes down quickly and these babies are worth the wait. Benito’s Hat is closer on New Row, and the staff are friendly there too, but to be honest it rates lower in my Burrito League. Yes, I’ve got a league. No, you can’t see it.
I know what you’re thinking, EAT? Really? There are fifty million branches of EAT around London (official figure), so you’d be forgiven for passing this one off as just another bloody generic food chain. But the one on Bedford Street is worth a visit purely because I reckon it has the friendliest staff in the entire world. Smiley, happy, chatty and always on hand with a quip about the weather, and a fork for when you get bored of spearing your vegetable dumplings with chopsticks.
There’s always a queue out the door during lunchtime at this place, even though there are about five other places alongside that serve the exact same thing. And do you know why there’s a queue out the door? Because it’s staffed by nice, polite, friendly people who make a blummin’ brilliant toasted ciabatta sandwich (and other stuff), and you get free soup with it. I’ve yet to pin down the slightly ambiguous flavour of the soup, but it’s the thought that counts.
So there you have it. Three places to get food while you’re waiting for the country’s biggest supermarket chain to sort out its hygiene. Enjoy.
As Monday’s post proved, there’s nothing a Londoner loves more than feeling a little bit superior to those around them.
Hark at those tourists who can’t pronounce our place names (Mary-Le-Bone indeed), and tut! Those fools who fling themselves at a closing door when there’s another train coming in one minute’s time. And oh, how we pity the misguided souls who get two trains from Great Portland Street to Regents Park instead of just crossing over the road.
“You’ll be waiting there a while!” laughed one smug bastard in Kentish Town the other day, as he sauntered past me waiting patiently at the bus stop. “There’s a hundred people waiting at the one before this!”
Others just can’t help themselves before giving a quick, disdainful shake of the head: “Those buttons don’t work. Haven’t for years” to the man frantically pressing the flashing Open Doors button on the Jubilee Line.
But fear not. While in the old days you had to work hard to be superior, these days, there’s a load of apps, Twitter accounts and websites to do it all for you. Here are some to try…(more…)
